THINGS WILL NEVER BE THE SAME WITHOUT MY SON.

January 6, 2026 by Sheryl J. Moore

>>>>>>>>>>>I lost a lot when I lost my son to suicide.<<<<<<<<<<<<

************************** *I lost my concept of time.***************************

I don’t even know what things happened before, or after, AJ Betts took his own life.

********************************I lost my friends.********************************

I am not certain if that has to do with your friends not wanting to think that what happened to your child, could happen with theirs?

********************************I lost my family.********************************

Only one of my four siblings even attended the funeral. My eldest sister said she had to cut ties with me because I was “too sad.”

***************************I lost my independence.****************************

It just seems like my anxiety has gotten worse, each year since he passed.

****************************I lost my love for myself.***************************

I used to be so into me. I loved my personality, my appearance, my smarts.

*************************I lost my joy for the holidays.*************************

I cannot stand decorating for any holiday, much less “celebrating” it without my son. (But I put on my “mask” for the littles.)

>>>>>>>>>>That all said, AJ’s death has brought “gifts.”<<<<<<<<<<<

******************************I am a better Mom.*******************************

My children cannot go outside of the house without me kissing and hugging them tightly. You never know when it will be your last opportunity…

*****************************I am a better listener.******************************

Talking used to be my thing. However, I’ve learned that people feel valuable when you listen to them. Now, I am trying my best to show others that I care.

*******************************I am a better boss.*******************************

While already empathetic, I now put myself directly in my employees’ shoes. I treat them as I would want to be treated by my old bosses.

*******************************I don’t give a sh*t.*******************************

I no longer dress up in suits and heels. I don’t do my makeup or flat iron my hair. I really don’t care what others think about my appearance any longer. It is liberating.

THINGS WILL NEVER BE THE SAME WITHOUT MY SON.

But I am to the point where that’s okay. I am still crushing it. Happy New Year!